People and songs

It's not the most obvious thing in the world, but I am sure we've all realised it at some point in life. Every person in your life is remembered or related to with some song you've heard. Sometimes It's the best feeling in the world to be reminded of the person every time you hear the song and sometimes it's the worst.

I have always be one of those people who customises ring tones for every person in their contact list. The ability of these songs to unconsciously ring a memory in your mind when the person calls, is a feeling that have always brought immense happiness to me.

This relationship between a song and a person is a result of many instances that have happened in my life. The first moments spent together, personalities the songs matched, the first time introductions, the embarrassing drunk episodes, those intimate moments when they just happened to be playing in the background and lyrics that seemed like they had been written with that particular person in mind.

I enjoy all kinds of music genres. And to an extent I believe it is only because of these links that the songs share with important people in my life. It's possible to forget what has happened in the past and move on, but it's amazing how songs can bring back a myriad of memories which have been hibernating in our hearts and minds for years together. Everyone has had people walk in and walk out of their lives. And this whole concept of 'it's the ones that leave footprints in your heart' is a load of crap! If they left then they weren't meant to be with you anyway and what is the point of their footprints being left behind when those footprints are only going to walk all over you, stomping heartache all along the way? But nevertheless, we have good and bad memories linked with everyone and sometimes it is nice to be reminded of those happy times spent with each other.

I had five extremely close friends that I would do anything for out of which four have remained. And this post is a result of me standing near my window watching the pelting rain outside, wishing I was with all of them together sipping filter coffee and getting drenched in Bangalore rain.

So to Adeesh, every time you call I hear 'watch the sunrise'. I don't really know why this song is linked to you but It's been my ringtone for 2 and a half years now and it's not going to change either :)

To Sejal, our song has always been bitter sweet symphony even though you may not agree with it! And to you as well, It's not going to change! :)

To Nangu, you will probably remember this song as the one you loved during your devdaas days. But I will remember it as our song all the way. Carnival of rust.

To Smita, I think we liked this song because of the movie. I have been wanting to set 'Say what you need to say' as your contact ringtone for over 4 years now but I still haven't done it! Nevertheless, It always brings a smile to my face when I hear it :)

And last, to you who I don't have one, but multiple songs related to. You didn't stay my 'wonderwall' and you promised your 'fix you' abilities for life, but things change and all I can really say is that they still make me nostalgic. 

Diwali Blues

Diwali is around the corner. The decorations that have been put up in Little India do no justice to what Diwali actually is in 'Big' India. But then again, I am living in Singapore!

Ma and Pa had visited kas and me in Singapore for diwali last year and they're going to be here this year as well. Mom very lovingly brought us one of those tiny kandils (lanterns) to hang in the house last year. But after spending all my childhood years staying up and waiting for my dad to come home and help build the kandil with, it really is a horrible feeling to be away from it for 3 years. I know I should be happy that they make it a point to celebrate it with us every year but I miss my colourful kandil, hand painted diyas and rangoli welcoming home.

Dad, mum, Kas and I would end up sleeping really late the morning before diwali and Kas and I hated the fact that we would have to wake up before the sunrise. We were like zombies being forced to bathe and dress up. For those of you who don't know, Indian families that celebrate Diwali in a big way spend hours before the big day making sweets. Thankfully we are one of them! After a certain point I wasn't allowed in the kitchen as I would quietly sneak in every 2 minutes and gobble up all the shankarpalis (diamond shaped sweet thingis - my favourite!) In fact I used to feel really bad when ma wanted me to go and give them to the neighbours. Obviously the full quantity that ma put in the plate originally, would reduce to half by the time I reached.

Diwali evenings were spent waiting for family friends to come home. But for those few minutes before they arrived, we'd sit in the balcony under the kandil and surrounded by diyas, listening to the silence that made way for the sound of the millions of crackers being lit all over Bangalore. There were probably thousands of people on the roads or in their houses bursting crackers, but it was only the sound of the crackers that filled the air and added more life to those evenings. Sometimes I wish Bangalore wasn't so dear to me.

I sit here for the 4th time, away from home and reminiscing about Diwali in Bangalore. I still feel the same. I don't think I can hold on to the visual memories of diwali spent in Bangalore for long. But the memories that found their way into my heart, that of stealing shankarpalis, painting diyas and making the rangoli with ma, making the kandil with dad, lighting fuljhadis with kastu and listening to the silence that spread happiness through Bangalore air, will never burn out.

Bangalore days

For hours we sat on the same familiar steel and cane chairs, sipping mochachillos till we half froze with no jackets to wear.

Never a silent moment to feel awkward in because every silly little word uttered we'd want to remember for memories to laugh over next year,

We'd laugh over how the sweethearts sat for hours together looking at each other not uttering a word, and it would only be later that we would realise we were doing the same thing with each other!

Those peaceful lazy Sundays spent with mum and dad will forever keep them young in my heart for what I found funny always found their company.

Parents never grow old, they just become younger as we grow older.

Friends go both ways. Either you win some or you lose some. But the ones that are meant to stay, stay for long and strengthen with time and distance.

A partner who never loses sight of the big picture is a partner to keep, for it is only someone of great virtue and courage who can love you no matter how many miles away you are from each other.

Each time I go back there are more memories waiting around the corner everyday. Bangalore greets me with open arms and a heart bursting with love and happiness which don't have an expiration date.

You're like a time capsule that blocks out all the stress, the tears, the heartache, the longing, the sorrow, the problems and the unfulfilled urges and expectations. Bangalore, you will always be in my heart and mind, all the time, never failing to bring out a smile.